From Silence to Survival: Ruth Carroll's Journey Through Decades of Abuse to Radical Healing
Content Warning: This episode contains detailed discussions of childhood sexual abuse, domestic violence, physical abuse, substance abuse, and suicide. Listener discretion is strongly advised.
In this powerful episode of The Human Experience, host Jennifer Peterkin sits down with Ruth Carroll—a survivor whose story spans decades of unimaginable abuse, yet who now stands as a beacon of hope and resilience.
Ruth's story begins in the innocence of childhood, with memories of happy Christmases and playing in the front yard. But at age six, when her parents divorced without explanation, everything changed. Moving in with her grandparents at seven, Ruth entered a world of psychological, physical, and sexual abuse.
From there, Ruth's life became a devastating cycle: constant abuse, relocations every six months that prevented her from forming friendships, a near-abduction at 15 that nearly ended in murder, running away at 16 to escape into an 18-year abusive marriage, and even encounters with demonic worship and threats against her life.
Yet through it all—through two suicide attempts, years of being told she was worthless, and a nervous system perpetually on high alert—Ruth found unexpected gifts: a calling as an EMT where her trauma became her superpower, the strength to learn karate and car mechanics to prepare her escape, and ultimately, a relationship with God that anchored her healing.
Now remarried for the right reasons, a professional photographer, and the author of a memoir, “Held By His Hands”, Ruth shares her story - not for shock value, but to tell even one person: You don't have to live like this. You are not alone. There is a way out.
This is a story of survival, resilience, and the evergreen journey to true healing.
This episode was recorded in West Chester, Pennsylvania.
MEET RUTH CARROLL:
From the age of seven to thirty-five, Ruth’s life was shaped in shadows—learning how to survive before she ever learned how to feel safe. Ruth walked through years of abuse, silence, and fear, carrying wounds no one could see. She escaped with her life, but I did not escape alone. God met her in the darkest places, lifted her from what tried to destroy her, and taught her heart how to breathe again. What was meant to break her became the soil where faith and healing took root. Ruth’s story is one of survival, surrender, and the quiet power of grace.
CONNECT WITH RUTH:
Purchase Ruth’s Memoir - Held By His Hands
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Abuse creates distorted normal: When abuse starts in childhood, victims have no baseline for healthy relationships—everything abusive becomes "normal."
- Abusers isolate their victims: Constant moving, controlling money, disabling cars, and cutting off support systems are all tactics to maintain power.
- Strangulation is a red flag for lethality: Non-fatal strangulation is one of the strongest predictors that an abuser will eventually kill their victim.
- Trauma can become a gift in unexpected ways: Ruth's history of trauma gave her unique resilience as an EMT—her different baseline allowed her to help others in crisis.
- Healing is not linear and takes time: Ruth didn't begin true healing until her 50s, after multiple failed relationships and years of codependency.
- You don't need to understand everything to escape: Ruth learned karate, car mechanics, and saved money without a clear plan—she just knew she needed skills to survive.
- Building community is important: The church gave Ruth her first understanding that she was loved and that the abuse wasn't her fault.
- Children need to be told what's happening: Ruth's parents never explained the divorce—this lack of information left her feeling abandoned and confused for decades.
- Breaking codependency requires solitude: Ruth needed five years living completely alone before she could enter a healthy relationship.
- You can break generational cycles: Ruth gave her children the boundaries and values she never received, even though she felt like she was failing them.
IF YOU ARE IN CRISIS:
- National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233
- National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
- National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 988
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